My Kansas (so far)

Kansas. It’s a state as flat as Britney Spears without her Autotune. It’s as windy as my dad after he ate onions. It’s as hot as mom’s apple pie on the window sill and as pretty as…mom’s apple pie on my plate.
It’s the state that brings us a lot of corn, including those commercials for Viagra, with former Kansas Senator Bob Dole holding his erect pen in his hand. Ummmm, that WAS his pen, I hope. It also produces enough grains and wheat to feed the world, and that is saying something. I am out here to help promote a charity that fights hunger issues, aren’t I?
Actually, I was dreading Kansas. I knew it was flat and was secretly happy about that, since it would allow me to kind of move quickly without too much gravity, but the sheer length of the state and the straightness of the roads looked to me to be a recipe for the most boring two or more weeks of this trip. But it has been anything but boring. I’ve walked a lot, spent a few nights sleeping under the stars that were just extraordinary, including the Hilltop Rest area, last night, a place that ranks second on my Most Special Places List, after Cotter, Arkansas. This might be due to the kind attention of miss Susie, the woman who maintains it, but it is also due to the incredible view of horizons that stretch endlessly, a wind farm, and more.
As I walk west, the look of the people slowly but subtly changes. The guys who look and dress like Eminem kind of fade away and more cowboy hats than hoodies can be seen. Ditto cowboy boots, even on women. Small dairy farms seem to not exist here, and mega ranches are everywhere. The cattle still look like retired Jersey housewives chewing gum and waiting for something big to happen ( they really have no clue!)
Speaking of mega…the horizons. Coming from a small sky kind of place like upstate New York, where the mountains rise up and block any chance of a distant horizon, the endless flatness here is something to behold, and while walking along the flat, open plains, the wind, pretty much a constant force of nature (literally!) keeps you on your toes, leaning to one side often.
Picture this: walking down an endless road, straight ahead, little traffic. The sun is out, it is hot, but the breeze is so strong that you are constantly being cooled by it. You look to your left, if you are walking west, and the yellow wheat fields resemble nothing less than an ocean, and the waves of wind have captured the tops of the grain and beautiful patterns are emerging every second, like the sand in the desert after a strong wind blows it around. The only sound is the wind and the occasional cry of a blackbird or a crow. That is my Kansas, so far. It isn’t exciting, but it doesn’t need to be.